/ General Jokes
A Blonde, Wanting To
Earn Some Money, Decided To Hire Herself Out
As A Handyman And Started Canvassing A Well-To
Do Neighborhood. She Went To The Front Door
Of The First House And Asked The Owner If He
Had Any Jobs For Her To Do.
"Well, You Can
Paint My Porch. How Much Will You Charge?"
The Man Asked.
The Blonde Said, "How
About 50 Dollars?"
The Man Agreed And Told Her That The Paint And
Other Materials She Might Need Were In The Garage.
The Man's Wife, Inside The House Had Listened
To The Conversation Between The Blonde And Her
Husband Asked, "Does She Realize That The
Porch Goes All The Way Around The House?"
The Man Replied, "She Should, She Was Standing
A Short Time Later
The Blonde Came To The Door To Collect Her Money.
Finished Already?" He Asked.
"Yes The Blonde Answered, "And I Had
Paint Left Over, So I Gave It Two Coats."
Impressed, The Man Reached In His Pocket For
The 50 Dollars.
"And By The Way," The Blonde Added,
"It's Not A Porche, It's A Lexus."
A mother-in-law stopped
unexpectedly by the recently married couple's
house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into
the house. She saw her daughter-in-law standing
naked by the door. "What are you doing?"
"I'm waiting for
my husband to come home from work," the
"But you're naked!"
the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love
dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But
"My husband loves
me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and
it makes me happy. I would appreciate it if
you would leave because he will be home from
work any minute."
The mother-in-law was
tired of all this romantic talk and left. On
the way home she thought about the love dress.
When she got home she got undressed, showered,
put on her best perfume and waited by the front
Finally her husband
came home. He walked in and saw her standing
naked by the door.
"What are you
doing?" he asked.
"This is my love
dress," she replied.
There is a beautiful
deserted island in the middle of nowhere where
the following people are stranded:
* 2 Italian men and
1 Italian woman
* 2 French men and 1 French woman
* 2 German men and 1 German woman
* 2 English men and 1 English woman
* 2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
ONE MONTH LATER on
the beautiful deserted island in the middle
* The 1st Italian
man killed the other for the Italian woman.....
* The 2 French men and the French woman are
living happily together in a "menage a
* The 2 German men have a rigid weekly schedule
of when they alternate with the German woman....
* The 2 English men are waiting for someone
to introduce them to the English woman....
* The Irish began by dividing their island Northside-Southside
and setting up a distillery. They don't remember
if sex was in the picture, because it got sort
of foggy after the first few litres of coconut-whiskey,
but at least they know the English aren't getting
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